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by VEC_16_04



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-08
Updated: 2018-01-23
Packaged: 2018-03-29 15:00:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3900553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VEC_16_04/pseuds/VEC_16_04
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Becky is waiting in line for the security. She looks once again in her purse, making sure she isn’t carrying anything that is prohibited to bring onto the plane. She notices an envelope, she is pretty sure it was not in there when she packed her bag yesterday morning. She takes it out and spots Hope’s name on it. Weird, why would a letter addressed to Hope be in my purse?<br/>Since Hope has already passed security Becky puts it back into her purse, figuring she will give it to Hope once she has passed security.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Becky is waiting in line for the security. She looks once again in her purse, making sure she isn’t carrying anything that is prohibited to bring onto the plane. The defender notices an envelope, she is pretty sure it was not in there when she packed her bag yesterday morning. She takes it out and spots Hope’s name on it.  _Weird, why would a letter addressed to Hope be in my purse?_ Since Hope has already passed security Becky puts it back into her purse, figuring she will give it to the keeper once she has passed security. She takes off her watch and places everything onto a plastic box.

The defender waits for the officer’s signal, she walks through the metal detector and holds her breath, praying it won’t go off. She doesn’t hear a beep and is relieved she can just wait for her stuff and join the team without having to be frisk searched, again. HAO, who stands in the row next to her, smiles. Becky smiles to, the last 14 times she was in an airport and had to go through security she has been frisk searched, the first time because she forgot to take off her belt, the second time because she forgot she was still wearing her watch, all the other times she was just randomly selected out (probably because she looked a bit too nervous).

She sees ‘her’ box coming out of the x-ray machine and is happy she did get passed security this time without having spiked the attention of the officers. But then she spots the worried look in one of the officers’ eyes. The officer walks next to her box and looks at her. “Is this your purse?” “Yes it is.” Becky answers a bit nervously, her mind is already going over everything that is in her purse trying to determine what was not permitted to take along. “Can you please open it?” She opens the bag and holds it for the officer to look in it. The man takes out the letter and asks her if she knows what is inside while he feels the envelope with his hands, there is clearly something else than just a letter inside. “I don’t know, it is addressed to my teammate Hope Solo, she probably forgot something in the locker room and figured I could give it back to Hope.” “Is she married?” Becky nods. The worried look on the officers face disappears, “Than tell your teammate it is not really smart to forget her ring in the locker room.” Becky nods, a bit surprised Hope would forget her wedding ring.

He hands her back the letter and says “Next time make sure you know everything that is inside your bag because next time it might be drugs or weapons instead of a wedding ring.” Becky nods, realizing this could have ended worse. “Good luck in Canada” “Thanks.” Becky replies, surprised the officer recognized her.  _Or maybe he knows Hope plays on the USWNT and figured since I am a teammate of hers, I also go to Canada._  Becky puts the letter back in her purse, takes her watch and quickly makes her way HAO. “What did you do this time?” HAO asks with a smile. “It wasn’t my fault, it was Hope’s.” HAO looks questioning at the defender, but the defender doesn’t reply, she just heads for were the team is assembled.

Becky makes her way to the keeper. “I thought you would want this back before you go home to your husband.” Hope looks surprised but takes the envelope and opens it. The first thing she spots is the letter inside the envelope but the first thing she takes out is a wedding band.

Becky looks at the keeper, she expected some kind of thank you for bringing her her wedding band. Instead Hope looks shocked and ~, well Becky cannot really tell how Hope really looks, eventually she settles for ‘broken’. When Becky is sure Hope won’t say anything she shrugs it off and makes her way back to HAO.

Carli, who had witnessed the whole interaction, frowns. She walks to the keeper and sits down next to her. She takes a look at what Hope is holding in her hand. “Finally thinking about walking away from him?” Carli realizes that no one else would have dared to say this. But everyone felt the same, felt like the keeper could do that much better. Carli expected Hope’s famous ice glare. Instead she just gets this broken look.

Hope cringes and takes some deep breaths, even her best friend doesn’t know. “I’m not married to Jerramy.” Hope says softly, but clear enough for Carli to hear. “WHAT?” Carli lets out in surprise, Hope doesn’t repeat it because she knows the midfielder heard her. “If you are not married then why did you checked the ‘married’ box on your World Cup form?” “I didn’t say I wasn’t married. I said I’m not married to Jerramy”

 

With the mentioning of Jerramy Hope’s mind flashes back to the night after the Iceland game.

“I just…” She trails off, not really sure how to tell how she really feels “Do you know how hard it is to see your wife wearing her ex’s name on her gloves?” Kelley asks, hurt evident in her voice. Hope looks at Kelley’s hand, no wedding band to be seen, and then looks at her own, her wedding band shines brightly. A wedding ring everyone else thinks she shares with Jerramy Stevens. Hope cringes. She knows she is hurting Kelley and for that, she hates herself even more.

“Kelley” Hope says, hoping her wife would look at her instead looking at the ocean in front of them. Since Kelley doesn’t bilge, Hope gently turns Kelley’s head towards her. “Soon I promise…” “That’s what you said over a year ago!” Kelley interrupts angrily. Hope hates to do this but she has to make clear that that is not the case. “No it is not. Then I said I would change it and now I’m telling you it will change soon.” “What’s the difference? Why is it is so important for you to have his name on your glove?” It wasn’t, to be honest Hope hated it. She had tried multiple things to avoid it but it always came back to bite her in the ass.

For instance one time she ‘forgot’ her gloves so she had to wear Ashlyn’s resulting in an angry Jill and Paul.  A few games later she covered the letters with duct tape resulting in Nike being angry, because it would imply their gear is made from poor quality materials and not suitable for professional games. The first two games of this tournament she only wore the name ‘Solo’, resulting in her receiving some very angry and threatening phone calls. So at today’s game she had been once again supporting the name Stevens on her glove, hoping this all would be over soon. But she could not tell Kelley all this because it would only result in Kelley hating her and it would also result in the end of her marriage. And that was not something Hope was going to let happen.

Hope is taken back from her thoughts by Kelley taking off her necklace. She knows what Kelley is planning on doing and panics. “No, Kelley please don’t do it!” By now the defender has already taken off the necklace and removed her wedding band from the necklace. She holds it out for Hope to take it, Hope refuses. Instead the keeper puts her hands over Kelley’s, covering the ring. “I know you deserve better but please don’t do this, not now. Can you give me another chance to fix the mess I made.” “Why?” Kelley asks. Hope knows she is not asking her why she would give the keeper another chance.

She cannot tell the real reason but she can give her another reason, it is not the main reason but it could be because Hope really felt this way. “I just, I feel like right now I’m not in a place that is good enough to be called your wife.” Kelley wants to interrupt but Hope puts up her hand, signaling she isn’t finished yet. “Don’t misunderstand me I’m very proud to be your wife. It is almost surreal that you would want to be with someone like me. But I want our friends, teammates, family and even the fans to say or think that I’m lucky to be with you but that I deserve to be with someone like you. And not be like, Kelley is way too good for her, she should have stuck with this Jerramy guy.”

This takes Kelley a bit by surprise, sure they are different but she never viewed Hope as being not good enough for her. Or her being better than Hope. They are both human and they both make mistakes, unfortunately for the keeper, her mistakes seemed to have a bigger impact or they are made more public, while Kelley’s mistakes are not.

“HOPE, YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH.” “No I’m not. I just come of a month suspension. Half of the fans think I should be kicked off the team.” Hope continues for a full minute but it was too silent and fast for Kelley to understand what she was saying.

Kelley, already forgotten why they were here in first place, takes her wife’s hand and says, “You deserve to be here, you made some bad calls in the past but who doesn’t? Nobody is perfect and if they cannot move on from the past that is their problem, not yours. You are not the same woman you were 6 months ago, nor are you the same woman you will be in 6 months.” Kelley makes sure Hope is looking her in the eye before she adds the last part “ And you are the best wife I can imagine. I love you.” A small smile appears on Hope’s face. Kelley closes the distance between them and makes sure she puts all her feelings into the kiss.

“Will you please give me another chance?” Kelley looks at the ring in her hands. She can’t do this, not now. Kelley nods and Hope slips the finger onto her wife’s ring finger. Kelley knows she will have to take off the ring before they go back inside but for now she will happily wear it. Kelley hugs her keeper and takes her hand afterwards. They walk alongside the coast, water and sand between their toes and for a moment all their problems are forgotten.

\------------

It was only now Carli notices Hope is still wearing her wedding ring. The one she is holding looks identical, maybe a bit smaller.

“Hope” Carli says, trying to get her friend back from wherever she is with her thoughts. “If not Jerramy…” “Kelley” Hope says before Carli finishes her sentence. “Kelley? As in our Kelley O’Hara?” Hope nods. Although Carli is shocked by the news she cannot prevent the smile that has made its way onto her lips. That smile soon disappears when she remembers Hope is holding Kelley’s ring. In meantime Hope has taken the letter out of the envelope. It is a short one. She knew she had taken a big risk by wearing Stevens on her gloves in the final against France but she hoped she could have talked to Kelley in person afterwards, instead of having to get the ring and this letter from Becky.

 

 

_Hope,_

_This is not me breaking up with you. This is me telling you the ball is in your court. Either you cannot change, than you should keep the ring and file for divorce. Or you overcome whatever it is that is holding you back and you change. No more Stevens on your gloves and you can give the ring back once you fulfill your promises. I love you. I really do and I always will but I cannot and will not be your wife if you feel like you cannot tell me what is really going on. Nor do I ever want to feel like I’m second best for you._

_Kelley_

Kelley’s words stung but Hope knows that from Kelley’s point of view she might come off as second best but to Hope she is and always will be the best. If there exists something to describe better than best, than that would be how she views Kelley.

Carli refrains from reading along, she figures whatever is written in there is only meant for Hope to read. So she looks up at where the rest of the team sits. She knows, from the look of some, they had been watching them so Carli sends them a glare, warning them to back off. Although she is pretty sure they have no clue in what is going on, Hope is a master in hiding her emotions only Carli and Kelley seem to be able to really read her. She looks back at Hope and notices her friend broke down a bit more. Carli just hopes that whatever was exactly going on between those two could be fixed. She hoped that this was not Kelley telling the keeper it is over. Because Carli wasn’t sure if Hope could survive that. In the short time she knows about the marriage between her two teammates a lot has become more clear and she questions how she could not have figured this out before.  

Carli wants to ask a million questions but with the rest of the team close by she doesn’t know if that would be such a good idea.

 

 _“Final call for the passengers on flight DE176. to Seattle.”_ “Hope, your flight is leaving.” “No it is not. I’m flying to New York.” Carli is confused,  _Why would Hope fly to New York instead of Seattle?_ She than remembers Kelley and Cheney leaving yesterday for NY. They had to be at some Under Armour photoshoot. “Right, you are married.” Pinoe, who had been walking by to catch her flight to Seattle, picked up on the last sentence and quickly says “Off course Hope is married, she isn’t wearing that bling bling just for show nor would she be putting Stevens on her gloves if she wasn’t married to him.”

_Why has she Stevens on her gloves? It is obviously that they are not married._

“I’ll tell you later.” Hope says and with that she is gone. Her flight doesn’t leave for another couple minutes but she needs to be away. She doesn’t want to breakdown completely in front of her teammates and she wants to be sure she has all the answers before Carli starts asking questions.

Hope walks onto the plane to NY. Ashlyn and Ali are surprised to see the keeper on the plane. “What are you doing here? Wasn’t there a direct flight to Seattle called earlier?” “Yes there was. But this is the fastest way home.” Hope says and proceeds walking to her seat, leaving her two teammates confused behind. She just hoped she still has Kelley to come home to.

 


	2. a beginning

Kelley texting her not to come hurt Hope more than she would ever admit.

She had been standing in front of Kelley's hotel when she saw the text notification.

For a second she contemplated to ignore it, put the phone back in her pocket and pretend she didn't see it. But eventually she let go of the door handle and turned back around.

Hope wandered the streets from NY for a while.

The city was a special one for her. Not only does it hold many secrets of her father she will never get to know or uncover, it is also the city Kelley lives in while in season.

Instead of continuing to wander around a city she will never really understand Hope flags down a cab.

She books her ticket on their way to the airport.

Maybe it is time to finally deal with it all.

 

 

 

 

 

Less than a month has gone by since they last saw each other.

Hope refrained from texting, wanting to be fully focused on sorting out the mess she is in and not wanting to let her fear of losing Kelley causing her to back out.

Kelley refrained from texting cause as she wrote down in the letter, the ball is in Hope's hands. Although there might have been one or two drunk calls.

 

Seeing each other again prior to the New Zealand game wasn't easy on either of them.

Carli caught Hope staring at Kelley on numerous occasions. She also noticed Kelley lingering around after training to watch the goalkeepers.

Outside of training Kelley sticks around Alyssa, JJ and Moe.

Carli keeps close to Hope, feeling somehow it was her duty to protect Hope. Even though she had no idea what Hope needed to be protected from.

Her dear friend still hadn't spilled any details, Carli was very proud of herself for not asking and letting Hope come to her about it. At the same time it was killing her. _Why didn’t Hope tell her that she married Kelley. How long have they been married? Who knows? Why did Kelley give back her ring? Are they still married?_ Those are just a few of the questions that are going around in her mind.

 

 

After the game, one where Kelley only played the last 7 minutes, Kelley saw something red from the corner of her eye. It took her all but 2 seconds to realize it was Hope walking towards her.

The two hug briefly

"Good game" Kelley compliments the keeper.

"Would you want to go out on a date with me?"

 

 

Now 3 hours later, Kelley is seriously doubting her answer.

_Why did had said yes so quickly? Was it because of the rush of winning the game still going through her body?_

_Was it because Carli was glaring at her and she didn’t want to get on Carli’s bad side._

Kelley’s only kidding herself. She knows why she said yes. She’s still head over heels in love with Hope and she’ll do anything to get to spend as much time as possible with her wife.

When she packed her bag she didn't think she would be going out on a date so she didn't really pack anything fancy. She also forgot to ask Hope what she should wear (as in what they are going to do).

“For fuck's sake Kelley, you're going on a date with your wife, you shouldn't be nervous!” Kelley scolds herself.  Except she was, big time.

 

Most of the team was out, and the ones that stayed in the hotel weren't walking around so Kelley managed to get outside without being seen.

Hope was waiting at the place where the team's vans were parked. But her wife is standing next to a rather fancy looking SUV instead of one of the vans.

She looked good. She looked nervous which in turn made Kelley a bit less nervous.

“You clean up nice” Kelley gives Hope a peck on the cheek before getting into the car. It is clear that Hope didn't expect that and she needs a couple seconds to recover. Once she does she checks and closes the passengers door while mumbling “thank you, you too”.  She then makes her way to the other side of the car, telling herself to calm down and missing the way Kelley smirked. Kelley has already plugged in her phone and is looking for some songs to play before Hope has left the parking spot.

 

 

 

“Old Joey’s place? Oh man. I’ve been dying to come back here?”  
“You remember?” Hope asks in surprise.

“Are you kidding me? I love this place. Apart from getting to see you, it was the only good thing of coming here and losing 2-0.”

 

Hope raises an eyebrow “That was 5 years ago. You remember all of your games?

“Well I did go to Stanford and I scored on you that game. Remember?”  
“Nope you did not. It didn’t count. You were off side.”  
Kelley raises an eye brow “so who is remembering all their games now”  
“Only the ones with you in it babe.”

Kelley chuckles, “I knew it. Back then you were already head over heels for me. Why else would you include me in the group. Me and Ali (Riley) were the odd ones out- ”

“Pretty sure it was just you, I already knew Ali from international games and the Olympics in 2008.”  
“Oh” Kelley pouts and runs to catch up with Hope.  
And with that, they were just Mrs and Mrs O’Hara-Solo out on a date.

 

 

 

 

Kelley watches Hope. She’s sitting too far away to hear what she and Joey are talking about. It doesn’t matter though. Cause seeing Hope relaxed around people she doesn’t have to keep her guard up. It is a nice change. With the World Cup and Olympics coming up Kelley already fears that Hope, the relaxed one, won’t be around a lot.    
_God why is loving Hope so hard? Well actually loving her is real simple. Being with her is a bit more tricky._

 

Hope catches Kelley’s gaze. She smiles, turns her attention back onto Joey. Shortly after Hope makes her way back to Kelley.

“You ready to go?”  
“Yes I am” Kelley says while interlacing her fingers with Hope’s.

On their way out the couple once again say bye to Joey and his daughter.

 

"Is it ok if we go for a small drive? I would like to show you something." And just like that, the entire atmosphere shifts. Kelley nods and let Hope lead her back to the car.

Kelley knows that she’ll finally get the explanation she has been waiting for a long time. She just wished tonight was not the night. She’s had a great evening. Just her and Hope, the Hope she fell in love with. Eating dinner, talking, joking, laughing, it has been too long since it was just the two of them.

 

 

“How do you even know of these places?” Kelley asks while taking in the sight.

“I joined a writing club when I first arrived here in 2009. There was this one writer who loved to walk around the city, looking for places where she felt at peace. She was a pretty good writer. I actually got to see a lot of the city because of her.”

“was?”  
“yeah, she had a TBI. Ever since her mind hasn’t been able to come up with the same kind of stories as she wrote before.”

Kelley keeps on her gaze on the river, unsure of what to say. She does reaches out to take Hope’s hand into hers.

“Stay here, I’ll be back in 2 minutes. I just need to go get something form the car.”  
  
Kelley nods, shifts a bit uncomfortable and decides to sit on top of the little wall, with her back to the river.

Soon her wife reappears, holding a cardboard box.

 

Hope hands Kelley the shoe box in silence.

The defender looks excited

She opens the box and with it the excitement quickly disappears.

Kelley grabs a few of the articles that are inside.

She just scans through the headlines.

"Hope, what is this?"

"Before I'm doing this I just wanted to remind you of who I'm."

This wasn’t easy for the keeper but it was her way of giving Kelley an out.  


"Hope I know all this and this is not who you are, sure it is a part of your past but that is what it is, a part of your past."

Kelley wanted to add that she knows what the keeper is trying to do but it is not going to work because she loves her, but she couldn't. She couldn't

"You don't know all of it."

Kelley frowns her eyebrows before digging through the articles.

“Hope, I know all this! These do not define nor reflect who you truly are.”

The keeper shakes her head, “No you don’t. There is something else, something you don’t know yet, I should have told you earlier but... .” 

Kelley looks through the pieces of paper, the last one seems much older.

‘Teen killed in car accident.’

Kelley scans the article, and she doesn’t see Hope’s name, nor does she see anything else that implicates the keeper.

So she starts over and reads it.

Still, she is not any wiser as to why the article is in this box, or why it is so important to Hope.

“We were both in no condition to drive, but she seemingly managed to do fine, or at least I thought so. Until I woke up again, the windshield shattered, some tree branches inside the car, my ribs were hurting like hell- ”  
Hope closes her eyes for a second, as if she was pushing away a memory.

 

“She somehow lost control over the car and crashed. I called 911, and stayed with her. But once I heard the sirens coming closer and saw the lights , I told her to keep holding on, to keep fighting cause help would be there soon and then I ran. I had already signed with Washington. If I got caught drinking underage, the accident and all, they would have cancelled my admission and that would have been the end of my ticket out. I thought she would be fine.”   
Hope has to take a short break to get rid of the tears and compose herself.

 “In the morning I learned that she was pronounced dead on arrival by the paramedics. How is that even possible? There must not have been more than a minute between me leaving and the paramedics arriving. … I just don’t understand.”

Hope curses herself, she told herself she’d keep it together. And here she is, a mess.

 

With the way Hope acted with drunk driving, or just drinking and driving, it didn’t take a genius to know that she had some previous traumatizing experience. Kelley just never expected something like this.

 

“What has Jerramy to do with all this?”

“As I was running away, I bumped into him, at the time he didn’t know. He realized afterwards that that must have been where I was coming from.”

 

“Hope, he has no proof that you were there, plus as you’ve told me. There wasn’t anything you could have done to help her, was there?”

 

Hope shakes her head “No there wasn’t anything I could have done. But I could have insisted on letting someone else drive. I could have stayed with her. We could have not sneaked out. Jerramy hasn’t got any proof but he doesn’t need any. Just getting the story into the world is enough to end my career for good, after that, not even Laura is going to want me to play for her team. More importantly it might be the final straw and you finally realize you can do so much better.”


End file.
